Monday, September 12, 2011
Approach Each Obstacle With Grace
I've watched my emotions and insecurities get the best of me many times. I've let them be the rational for my behavior. I've let them keep me from rising above, from being the best I can be. I've acted selfish, and less than kind when they've taken over. I haven't approached each obstacle with grace. I've approached many with grace, but many without. Now this is one of my biggest goals. To be able to rise above, to no matter the situation, stay composed and make the healthiest and kindest decisions. To not justify any poor behavior with the circumstances. This doesn't mean I can't be sad, or angry. It also doesn't mean I can't cry, or express my emotions to others. It only means I don't take things out on other people, and I don't let it take over my mindset. I stay true to myself, I treat everyone the best I can, I treat myself the best I can. I stay mentally and physically healthy, I behave in a way that makes me proud, and that others can respect.
Friday, September 9, 2011
Unconditional Love
I've noticed how most people choose not to love unconditionally. Their love is conditional. I don't think it matters if it's family, a friend, or a loved one. If the person is someone you actually truly care about then you should love them unconditionally. When a person makes mistakes, whether it affects you directly or not, I think forgiveness is the most important thing. I think what people need to understand is that everyone has insecurities, and these insecurities lead to their flawed actions. Everyone makes mistakes. Some are more conscious than others, but nearly all are caused by their personal insecurities, of course not all, some are due to a lack of experience or knowledge or whatever else.
As a person, I'm always trying to be the best I can be. I've been forced to really look in the mirror lately as my intimate relationship became something I have to fight for. Once I pulled my crushed heart out of the mix, and could really see how things were, and why they were that way, I was able to realize that all the things I had to fix on my end began with my insecurities. I began by realizing some of my behavior which was pushing her away. And from that I tried to understand why I'd behave that way. And once I got these answers, I was able to see clearly what my insecurities were, and that they were the base of my problems. In order to become a stronger, healthier, better person, and in order to help fix my relationship, I had to start by understanding my insecurities, and noticing when they would take over, and cause me to behave poorly. I think I've successfully done that. I haven't eliminated my insecurities, but I now catch myself thinking in these ways, and instead of acting in a way that matches my insecure emotion, I stop myself. I over power it with reason.
Now, wouldn't you rather stick around to watch your friends, family, and lover grow, than disappear on them because of an insecurity (or 10)? I would. The more insecurities people have, the less happy they can truly be. I'd rather give them one more reason to be happy by being there for them, and give them (almost) all the chances they need to become a better, stronger person than run from them when clearly they need the friend. I think when you actually care about a person's well-being and happiness, that means unconditional. If it's conditional, it means nothing. Accept. Forgive. Believe. Love. It's simple. It's not always easy, but it's simple.
In my eyes, those who have found a way to become the most secure with themselves, or at least control their insecurities, are the happiest, kindest, strongest people. You'll know these people when you see them too. They go about their life, not hating on people, not needing to gossip, or say a mean word. They won't let the cruel get to them because they'll understand those who aren't kind, aren't happy. They'll stick around to help, and they'll make the best decisions. These are the people who become hero's. Last, and most importantly, they'll approach each obstacle with grace. Which leads me to my next entry...
As a person, I'm always trying to be the best I can be. I've been forced to really look in the mirror lately as my intimate relationship became something I have to fight for. Once I pulled my crushed heart out of the mix, and could really see how things were, and why they were that way, I was able to realize that all the things I had to fix on my end began with my insecurities. I began by realizing some of my behavior which was pushing her away. And from that I tried to understand why I'd behave that way. And once I got these answers, I was able to see clearly what my insecurities were, and that they were the base of my problems. In order to become a stronger, healthier, better person, and in order to help fix my relationship, I had to start by understanding my insecurities, and noticing when they would take over, and cause me to behave poorly. I think I've successfully done that. I haven't eliminated my insecurities, but I now catch myself thinking in these ways, and instead of acting in a way that matches my insecure emotion, I stop myself. I over power it with reason.
Now, wouldn't you rather stick around to watch your friends, family, and lover grow, than disappear on them because of an insecurity (or 10)? I would. The more insecurities people have, the less happy they can truly be. I'd rather give them one more reason to be happy by being there for them, and give them (almost) all the chances they need to become a better, stronger person than run from them when clearly they need the friend. I think when you actually care about a person's well-being and happiness, that means unconditional. If it's conditional, it means nothing. Accept. Forgive. Believe. Love. It's simple. It's not always easy, but it's simple.
In my eyes, those who have found a way to become the most secure with themselves, or at least control their insecurities, are the happiest, kindest, strongest people. You'll know these people when you see them too. They go about their life, not hating on people, not needing to gossip, or say a mean word. They won't let the cruel get to them because they'll understand those who aren't kind, aren't happy. They'll stick around to help, and they'll make the best decisions. These are the people who become hero's. Last, and most importantly, they'll approach each obstacle with grace. Which leads me to my next entry...
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
The Power of Love
I keep writing posts and then it takes me forever to post them.. in this case almost a month.
Recent events have led me to contemplate love, true love. What it is, how strong it is, what it should be able to overcome, if it is all you need, if it's enough. What I do know, is we aren't supposed to find the answer to all these questions. Love is the most powerful thing in the world. It's what you make it to be. Throughout life peoples perception on love will change, there's no right answer, but each person is able to come up with their own beliefs about it, and we can discuss it, and take peoples thoughts about it, to form your own strongest, most thought out belief of the strength of love and what it should overcome.
Weeks ago, when my friend and her fiance broke up, I was talking to my girlfriend (current ex. we're working on things) about love. I was saying how I wondered if love should be enough to overcome everything else. Or if love wasn't always enough, if you can truly be in love but there's so much other shit that sometimes loving someone means you have to let each other go. I was leaning towards true love being enough. She said the same. Now I'm at a point where depending on what happens with us, my view may alter, maybe for a while, maybe forever. It's allowed. As much as I love getting into my own personal life, I'll stop here, and spare you all the little details of my own relationship. Otherwise this already long post will become a whole book that no one will care to read.
Right now, I still believe in true love. I believe that true love is strong enough to overcome everything else. I don't believe in falling out of love. That is a belief of mine that has never altered. I believe that there are two main parts of loving someone, which are obviously tied together but both are needed for survival. One part is caring for them in a way that is so pure and real. You want to be the one to protect them, the one they lean on, the one that believes in them and never gives up on them. The other part is loving who they are, the deepest parts of them, the beauty in their soul. Now with this, I think the little things matter too but everyone is going to have something they view differently, and disagree on and with love, I think acceptance also plays a huge role. I think for true love to conquer all, you have to let it. If you let those little disagreements over-power love, that it's not necessarily not true love, it's a weakness. Love is the best thing in the world, it brings the most happiness, safeness, deepness. I think it's important to in the midst of whatever stress, tension, or disagreement come your way, to just stop for a second, hold each other, breath, and know that because you have each other everything else will be okay.
Recent events have led me to contemplate love, true love. What it is, how strong it is, what it should be able to overcome, if it is all you need, if it's enough. What I do know, is we aren't supposed to find the answer to all these questions. Love is the most powerful thing in the world. It's what you make it to be. Throughout life peoples perception on love will change, there's no right answer, but each person is able to come up with their own beliefs about it, and we can discuss it, and take peoples thoughts about it, to form your own strongest, most thought out belief of the strength of love and what it should overcome.
Weeks ago, when my friend and her fiance broke up, I was talking to my girlfriend (current ex. we're working on things) about love. I was saying how I wondered if love should be enough to overcome everything else. Or if love wasn't always enough, if you can truly be in love but there's so much other shit that sometimes loving someone means you have to let each other go. I was leaning towards true love being enough. She said the same. Now I'm at a point where depending on what happens with us, my view may alter, maybe for a while, maybe forever. It's allowed. As much as I love getting into my own personal life, I'll stop here, and spare you all the little details of my own relationship. Otherwise this already long post will become a whole book that no one will care to read.
Right now, I still believe in true love. I believe that true love is strong enough to overcome everything else. I don't believe in falling out of love. That is a belief of mine that has never altered. I believe that there are two main parts of loving someone, which are obviously tied together but both are needed for survival. One part is caring for them in a way that is so pure and real. You want to be the one to protect them, the one they lean on, the one that believes in them and never gives up on them. The other part is loving who they are, the deepest parts of them, the beauty in their soul. Now with this, I think the little things matter too but everyone is going to have something they view differently, and disagree on and with love, I think acceptance also plays a huge role. I think for true love to conquer all, you have to let it. If you let those little disagreements over-power love, that it's not necessarily not true love, it's a weakness. Love is the best thing in the world, it brings the most happiness, safeness, deepness. I think it's important to in the midst of whatever stress, tension, or disagreement come your way, to just stop for a second, hold each other, breath, and know that because you have each other everything else will be okay.
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